ᗯOᑌᒪᗪ YOᑌ ᗷE ᔕO KIᑎᗪ?

ʜɪ ʟᴏᴠᴇʟɪᴇs! ɪ ʜᴀᴠᴇɴ’ᴛ ᴡʀɪᴛᴛᴇɴ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴀ ᴡʜɪʟᴇ, sᴏ ɪ ᴅᴇᴄɪᴅᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴛʀʏ ɪᴛ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ. ʜᴏᴘᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏ!

sᴏɴɢ ʟʏʀɪᴄs ғʀᴏᴍ “ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ʙᴇ sᴏ ᴋɪɴᴅ?” ʙʏ ᴅᴏᴅɪᴇ ᴄʟᴀʀᴋ

ᴛʀɪɢɢᴇʀs: sᴡᴇᴀʀɪɴɢ

:yellow_heart: :yellow_heart: :yellow_heart:

”I ᕼᗩᐯE ᗩ ᑫᑌEᔕTIOᑎ, IT ᗰIGᕼT ᔕEEᗰ ᔕTᖇᗩᑎGE..”

sᴇᴘᴛᴇᴍʙᴇʀ 1sᴛ, 7:15 ᴀᴍ

Jared was already fifteen minutes late

As the run down Toyota pulled up to Evan Hansen’s house, Jared watched the nervous boy quickly scurry up to the car- getting in and rambling on about how he was going to be late and he was going to miss seeing Zoe practice for band and-

“Yo- Ev, chill out.... Haven’t you stalked that poor girl enough?” Jared said with a chuckle, putting on his familiar facade and turning up the radio before speeding out.

He glanced at Evan from time to time as they drove, his face staying neutral

“ᕼOᗯ ᗩᖇE YOᑌᖇ ᒪᑌᑎGᔕ? ᗩᖇE TᕼEY Iᑎ ᑭᗩIᑎ?”

Zoe Zoe Zoe it was always about Zoe. Sure, Jared knew he was an asshole most of the time to the boy exactly 2 months and 7 days younger than him, but he wasn’t always that way... behind closed doors, Evan and him had actually spent some really good time together.

But Jared’s debilitating insecurities never let himself act nice to Evan when there was people around

“ᑕᗩᑌᔕE ᗰIᑎE ᗩᖇE ᗩᑕᕼIᑎG, TᕼIᑎK I KᑎOᗯ ᗯᕼY”

ғᴇʙʀᴜᴀʀʏ 7ᴛʜ, 1:45 ᴘᴍ

It was at the orchard, hanging onto tree limbs, listening to Evan geek out, that Jared felt truly happy...

But he’d never let that on...

He’d brush it off with comments like

“Jesus Christ you’re such a dork,”

Or

“Oh my god you fucking loser,”

Watching Evan’s face distort slightly after each insult was so painful to Jared, but he kept doing it- because he was too cowardly to it to his own feelings

“I KIᑎᗪ Oᖴ ᒪIKE IT TᕼOᑌGᕼ... YOᑌ ᗯᗩᑎᑎᗩ TᖇY?”

But nothing could’ve prepared Jared for the pain of when Evan said he didn’t need anymore rides to school, because Zoe Murphy had offered to do it, being that they were dating now.

“Oᕼ ᗯOᑌᒪᗪ YOᑌ ᗷE ᔕO KIᑎᗪ ᗩᔕ TO ᖴᗩᒪᒪ Iᑎ ᒪOᐯE ᗯITᕼ ᗰE? YOᑌ ᔕEE, I’ᗰ TᖇYIᑎG, I KᑎOᗯ YOᑌ KᑎOᗯ TᕼᗩT I ᒪIKE YOᑌ- ᗷᑌT TᕼᗩT’ᔕ ᑎOT EᑎOᑌGᕼ... ᔕO Iᖴ YOᑌ ᗯIᒪᒪ ᑭᒪEᗩᔕE ᖴᗩᒪᒪ Iᑎ ᒪOᐯE -“

The rest of the year was so torturous.. on the one hand, Jared watched this shy anxious kid turn into this happy, outgoing one.

But he was also watching his long time crush falling in love with someone else...

And his tragic texts after drunk parties didn’t make him look any better

“I TᕼIᑎK IT’ᔕ OᑎᒪY ᖴᗩIᖇ, TᕼEᖇE’ᔕ GOTTᗩ ᗷE ᔕOᗰE ᗷᑌTTEᖇᖴᒪIEᔕ ᔕOᗰEᗯᕼEᖇE- ᗯᗩᑎᑎᗩ ᔕᕼᗩᖇE? ᑕᑌᘔ I ᒪOᐯE YOᑌ ᗷᑌT TᕼᗩT’ᔕ ᑎOT EᑎOᑌGᕼ, ᔕO Iᖴ YOᑌ ᗯIᒪᒪ..”

ᴍᴀʏ 5ᴛʜ, 3:00ᴘᴍ

Having the “just friends talk” right before they graduated, really put the cherry on top of an awful year. All the while Jared’s assholery continued, getting even worse as that was the only way he knew how to deal with a broken heart.

“ᑭᒪEᗩᔕE ᖴᗩᒪᒪ Iᑎ ᒪOᐯE ᗯITᕼ ᗰE”

ᴊᴀɴᴜᴀʀʏ 7ᴛʜ, sɪx ʏᴇᴀʀs ʟᴀᴛᴇʀ

After he graduated, he never dared turned back, never reached out to Evan, never even heard from him until he got the wedding invitations

Which he quickly tore and threw away

:yellow_heart: :yellow_heart: :yellow_heart: