My Story 🏳‍⚧

Hello! I’m not too active on Amino, but I thought I’d partake in #FurryPrideParade

This is one of the most important months to me. My entry is my story.

I decided to base this after I Saw the TV Glow. This movie impacted me so much, that I can’t help but tell my story this way.

I am a nineteen year old transgender man. When I was about seven years old, I was happy, and unaware of the world outside of my little mind. One day however, everything changed. I saw the TV glowing. I was confused as to what show was on. I didn’t understand why that show was playing. I decided to ignore the glowing for now.

But it didn’t stop.

Every single day, I’d by that damn TV, and it’d still be glowing. Sometimes it made me cry, and sometimes it even made me infuriated. I couldn’t put together why it was glowing. It wasn’t normal. I was never taught about how TVs glow, nor was it ever really a thought that crossed my mind until then. So I unplugged it.

Seven years later; I’m fourteen. I’m bullied at school for being different; And then the lockdown happened. I was trapped inside, alone with my thoughts. I couldn’t play outside. I couldn’t do anything but think. Then all of a sudden.

The TV started glowing again.

I stared at it for hours at a time, taking in the way it glowed. How each pixel harmoniously hummed as they glowed. It still didn’t feel right, but for some reason. This time, I didn’t want to turn it off. I went to my mother, and told her about the TV glowing. She asked me why I thought it glowed the way it did. And I replied with my answers.

My mother never really saw this coming. Rightfully so, she was afraid. She thought that maybe the wrong show was on, and that I’d eventually want to change it back to the way it was. But I was persistent.

The TV kept glowing brighter and brighter. It glowed so bright to the point to where it burned my eyes. I couldn’t ignore it anymore. The rest of my family didn’t believe me. They tried to turn the TV off for me. But I kept turning it back on, until one day, I just had enough. I felt alone, scared. I was having a crisis. I eventually smashed the TV to pieces. Bit by bit, every circuit, every bit of glass. Shredded.

I didn’t feel like myself anymore. I was constantly depressed. I didn’t want to be here. I knew I didn’t belong. My mother noticed. And slowly, she started to help me put the TV back together. Piece by piece, she made it work, until finally. It turned on again. That beautiful glow I once saw.

Today, I am nineteen, and the TV glows brighter than ever. I refuse to turn it off. I’m now starting testosterone, and I’m saving up for top surgery. I finally figured it out.

If you’re one of these people, I know today’s world is tough. I know it’s intimidating. I know you’re scared. But please. Be yourself. I know it’s hard to do nowadays, but don’t let yourself down. If you think you can do it in another life, make it this one. Flourish. Thank you to all who read this. :blue_heart: